A Second Edition Joke

The high-level thief, standing in the underground cave, says to his wizard companion, "I'm going to climb up to that ledge and see what's up there."

The wizard replies, "Okay, but don't take too long getting up. I just cast fly and I'll have ferried up the rest of the party by the time you reach the top. Don't worry, we'll secure the area before you get up there."

Later on in the adventure, the thief says, "I'm well trained in moving stealthily. I'll go on up ahead and see what the ogres are doing."

The wizard replies, "Okay, I'll go with you. Just wait a second while I cast improved invisibility on myself."

Finally, the adventure over, the thief ditches the wizard, tired of being one-upped on everything. "Here in town," he thinks to himself, "no one is better than me. Particular the stodgy old cleric." To prove it, he turns to his cleric friend. "You wait here. I'm going to talk to my pal Lefty in the alley back there. He might know something about our next adventure."

"Good," the cleric replies. "That will give you something to do. I don't want you to interrupt me while I confer with Odin about the future."

The thief eventually retires to become a rations merchant. The rest of the party goes on extraplanar adventures and saves the multiverse. "When we were low level," he says to a customer, "I could open doors and occasionally -- very occasionally --get in a backstab. They kept me around because I was sometimes useful.

"Toward the end I realized they were just keeping me around out of nostalgia."